Christmas is very nearly upon us and I have one question for you: how are you? It is very easy at this time of year to have been so busy finishing up work, organising your festive schedule, buying provisions and gifts and tidying everything up so you can actually have a break, that you are probably feeling pretty exhausted.
When we have been busy, we can feel like we are in a whirlwind and turn into people who are just “functioning”, just doing rather than being.
And even making sure we are having fun can feel like a box to tick – so much so that we forget even to enjoy what we have spent all that time and effort planning.
The festive period shouldn’t be stressful; it shouldn’t be full of things that you feel obliged to do, or people you feel you must see; and it shouldn’t leave you more tired after than when it started.
I am here to reassure you that you can stop and take a breath. And to remind you of what is actually important rather than what we are told is important. Fun shouldn’t be functional, and the festive period is never, ever picture perfect. And that is OK.
So, what do we need to focus on to ensure we benefit from the festive break, before we are back to all those regular life routines again?
Rest
How often have you gone back to work after Christmas and felt like you just haven’t stopped? We are so busy running around that we forget we need to catch up on sleep, and that we need to rest our brains as well as our bodies.
However much pressure you are under to meet up with everyone under the sun, or to be doing “fun” things all the time, stop and ensure that you have some time for yourself. Your body and brain are not machines and a day of rest is just as good for you as exercising or socialising. Everything needs to be in balance.
Simplicity
The world today feel complex and science shows us our brains are not designed to multitask, so try to focus on the small and simple. Avoid complex recipes for Boxing Day if you are feeling stressed; focus on simple activities such as a walk together or a board game rather than feeling you must do something major and complex. What matters is meaningful connection and that is often through simple, creative things.
Imperfection
Realign your expectations. Let the picture-perfect Christmas adverts be gone. Expect imperfection and enjoy it. To be imperfect is to be human, and we often connect much more with people when we are being truly human. Perfectionism breeds stress, lowers your self-esteem and is unachievable – so give it up.
Love and laughter
Whether or not you celebrate Christmas, it is a great time to be with the people you care about. You don’t have to buy expensive gifts to show people you love them. Use this time to really have a proper catch-up with those you don’t often see. Ask them the important questions to check in with how they are, as this time of year can be challenging for many. Let them know how much you love them and value them. And don’t forget to laugh.
Authenticity
To love someone is to accept them fully as they truly are. Often many of us feel we have to put up a front and pretend we are OK during this time. The best gift you can give someone is to allow them to be who they are and to feel what they are feeling. Shiny superficiality is not healthy; it doesn’t make anyone feel good. Be vulnerable, be yourself and choose to be around people who see you and want you to be exactly as you are.